Hosting is a skill that I feel I have tried to cultivate over the years after observing the masterful care that others have demonstrated in welcoming me to their spaces. To host someone well doesn’t mean that you meet every condition that Miss Manners expounded upon. A full set of silverware isn’t necessary, nor is home-cooked food. Hosting is more about curating an environment in which people can comfortably settle in and enjoy whatever is said and served.

Last year for my birthday, I wanted to host a party to celebrate the wonderful women who have impacted my life and helped shape me into who I am. The guest list quickly rose into the hundreds and I had a reality check that I lacked the time, budget and resources to host that many people for the intentional meal I envisioned.

However, the desire stayed on my heart and mind, and over the summer I teased out a more feasible idea of periodic Garden Party events — intimate gatherings to share a delicious meal and introduce some of the amazing women I know & love to each other. Given that the whole spirit of this was supposed to be inclusivity, I decided that each guest I invited would also get a plus-one to foster even more community engagement & connection building.

As a full-time creative, money isn’t always plentiful, but for each Garden Party event I had fun finding creative ways to use my resources (seeing the potential in my backyard/leveraging local venue connections; borrowing China from my mom; & using my learned skills of cooking, baking, flower arranging). I was also surprised to receive gifts of all kinds along the way (linens from grandmas, honey from neighbors, discounts on paper invites, unknown store credit for décor) which helped build out what I hope has been a great event experience.

Again, to be a good host does not require doing everything on your own, from scratch. But, I really enjoy the different elements of event planning and was passionate about going the extra mile. Each party included mailed invites; a buffet of home-cooked food; non-alcoholic specialty beverages; place cards (with a conversation-starting question inside); a show-stopper dessert; floral designs; and a small takeaway to continue the spread the spirit of joy throughout the community.

The whole concept of a Garden Party felt so much bigger than me and the execution of my vision felt like I was responding well to a calling. Each time women said yes & attended the event, I was humbled that they wanted to be a part of a random party and thrilled that they took time out of their busy lives to connect with others. Some women reconnected with old friends and others exchanged phone numbers or social media handles by the end. My cup was filled time and time again to see joy on the faces of women who were able to show up and simply enjoy an event that was curated just for them.

I hosted three Garden Party events this past fall, with plans to continue when mild weather re-enters the Midwest in the late spring. Until then, I’ll be gratefully reminiscing on the warm memories of kind conversations with really lovely humans.

SDG

LMB #31